Funny jokes of teacher and student
PAPPU : “K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L” !
TEACHER : No, that’s wrong.
PAPPU : Maybe it’s wrong. but you asked me how i spell it.
TEACHER : Pappu, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating ?
.
PAPPU : No sir, I don’t have to, my Mother is good cock.
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TEACHER : Pappu, your composition on “My Dog” is exactly the same as your brother’s. Did you copy this ?
PAPPU : No, Teacher, it’s the same Dog.
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Teacher: What are some products of the West Indies?
Student: I don’t know.
Teacher: Of course, you do. Where do you get sugar from?
Student: We borrow it from our neighbour..
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Teacher: Could you please pay a little attention here?
Student: yes mam, I am paying as little attention as i can. !!
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An E.N.T. Professor retired from college. In the farewell college faculty
gifted him a silver ear.
Thanking the faculty the professor said: “Thank god I am not a gynecologist.”
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Student1 :Do you want to hear a dirty joke?
Student 2: OK
Student 1: A white horse fell in the mud.
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Teacher: “Who can tell me what 7 times 6 is?”
Student: “It is 42 mam!”
Teacher: “great, and who will tell me what 6 times 7 is?”
Same student: “It 24 mam.”
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Two student were chatting:
First: Do you know what is snake’s favorite subject?
second:, no, you tell.
first: Hisssstory!!!
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Teacher: who will tell the chemical formula of water?
One student: Its “h.i.j.k.l.m.n.o.”
Teacher: What is this?
Student: Mam, yesterday you told us that it is H to O !!
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Jazzy: My father is pregnant, I will soon have brother.
Teacher: How can it be? It is not possible.
Jazzy: My mother had abdominal pain last month, than i got a little sister, now my father is undergoing the same pain.!!!
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Teacher: From where to where foreigner ruled us?
Student: I am not sure but I think from page 50 to 55…
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Teacher : if you want to make your character good, then say all woman ‘Mother’.
Student: well that will make my character good, but what about my Father ??
Two cows are standing in a field.
One says to the other “Are you worried about Mad Cow Disease?”
The other one says “No, It doesn’t worry me, I’m a horse!”
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Teacher :What happened in 1809?
Student: Abraham Lincoln was born.
Teacher :What happened in 1819?
Student: Abraham Lincoln was ten years old.
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A teacher asked student, What is the full form of Maths?
The student answered, 'Mentaly Affected Teachers Harrasing Students'
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Teacher asked, If I saw a man beating a dog and stopped him then what virtue would I be showing?
The student replied: BROTHERLY LOVE
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The teacher asked, 'Give me an example of Coincidence?'
Student replied, My mom and dad got married on the same date.
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Teacher: How old is your dad.
Student: He is as old as I am.
Teacher: How is it possible?
Student: Because he became a dad only after I was born.
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Teacher: Whats the meaning of Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder?
Student: Bamba'lakkadi Jimba.
Teacher: I dont understand anything you said.
Student: Same here.
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sir : if any dought ask me
student : sir, in question paper question is there but in answer paper no answer is there
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Teacher: Suppose, you have a box which contains a 10 foot snake...
Student: But Sir, snakes don’t have feet.
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Teacher: Tell me a way to prevent a disease which is caused by biting insects.
Student: Don’t get bitten by them.
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Jon and Ron are brothers. Their teacher told them to write an essay about Dog. After checking the essays the teacher said,
'Why both the essays are the same?'
Ron: Sir, our pet dog is same.
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Teacher: Suppose, you have offered money and knowledge. You have to take one of them. Which one you should choose?
Student: Money.
Teacher: I would have taken knowledge. But why do you take money?
Student: I have the lack of money that’s why. You have the lack of knowledge. That’s why
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Teacher: Tom! I know you are bad at spelling. That’s why I told you to write down this sentence 10 times. Why did you write only 4 times?
Tom: Sir, I am bad at math too.
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Teacher: Tell me an example of a creature which can live on water as well as the land.
Student: Frog.
Teacher: Another example.
Student: Another frog.
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Teacher: Which one is closer, Sun or Australia?
Student: Sun
Teacher: Why?
Student: We can see the sun all the time, but can’t see Australia.
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Teacher: Robin, I always see that when I start teaching in the class, you always talk with your friends.
Robin: But Sir, I don’t talk when I sleep.
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Teacher is explaining to the student,
'if you see someone sinking in the water, you should pull his hair to save him from the water. It will be easy for you.'
Student: but sir, if it happens to you, we shouldn’t help you.
Teacher: why?
Student: because you don’t have any hair.
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Teacher: You are late today Mike.
Mike: Sir, I obeyed a sign.
Teacher: What sign?
Mike: COLLEGE AHEAD, DRIVE SLOW.
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Math teacher: Tell me Jenny, if a milkman mixes 2 litres water and 1 liter milk, he will get 3 litres. What will happen if he mixes 6 litres of water and 3 litres milk?
Jenny: I am not a milkman, how can I solve it?
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Teacher: Suppose, you have 4 coins in your pocket and there is a hole in the pocket. All the four coins fall down from that hole. What will you have in your pocket?
Student: A hole.
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A new student came to the class. After asking his name the teacher said,
'What does your father do?'
Student: Whatever Mom says.
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Teacher: Sir, why doctors wear a mask when they do an operation?
Student: For safety. If the patient dies, others can’t find out who did the operation.
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Teacher: Gwen, come here and point out Africa from this globe.
Gwen: here
Teacher: Correct! John, who discovered Africa?
Class: Gwen!!
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Ben got 100 out of 100 in the exam. So the teacher gave him a gift and said,
I hope you will do the same in the next exam.'
Ben: Thank you Sir. I hope you will also print the question paper from my uncle’s printing shop next time.
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Teacher: You promised me to submit me a paragraph, right?
Student: Yes Sir.
Teacher: And I also promised that if you fail to submit it, I will punish you, right?
Student: Yes Sir, so it will be fair if you break your promise too.
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Teacher: Suppose, you have 2$. You asked your mother for one more. How many would you have then?
Student: 2$
Teacher: Why?
Student: Because my mother won’t give me any.
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After answering correct, the teacher said, 'Smith, tell me an important incident which never happened before within ten years'.
Smith: I answered correct today.
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Teacher: If your father and mother both give you 50$, what you will get?
Student: A new video game.
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Teacher: Why does sea water tastes like salt?
Student: Maybe a ship of salt sinked a long time ago.
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Student A: My teacher caned me for something I didnt do?
Student B: Thats so bad.
Student A: Well, I didnt do my homework.
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Maths mis: A=B, B=C, So A=C.
Prove this method with example.
Student: Mis, I love u. U love ur daughter. So i love ur daughter,
Thats all mis
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Student: I don’t think I deserve Zero in this answer paper.
Teacher: Agreed. You deserve -1.
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Teacher: Which is your native place?
Rahul: Maharashtra m'aam.
Teacher: Can you spell it?
Rahul: Actually my native place is goa.
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Teacher: Ron, your handwriting is very bad. You will suffer in the future.
Ron: Don’t worry Sir. I will be a typist.
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Opening the book in the class, the teacher asked, 'So, where were we?'
Student: In this class, Sir.
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